Quote:
Originally posted by Litespeed
So my real question is: how do I get my parents and my sister to love and appreciate Hal like I do? How do I get them to see past our differences and focus on the fact that their daughter is in love with a man who takes care of her and treats her well? How do I show them that I love them, though I am defying their wishes at every turn?
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I think the answer to all of your questions is, unfortunately, you don't. As others have said, sometimes there is no way to change someone's mind. Unfortunately, your family is not reacting to the situation at hand but to the fears and concerns in their own minds. Your sister sees you "repeating her mistakes;" she's so not complete with her own actions and experiences that she's projecting them onto you. Your parents see only one path to happiness - being Mormon and marrying Mormon - and are so blinded by their own fears for your happiness that they can't see how happy you actually are - after all, if you're happy with a non-Mormon, what does that say about their beliefs? That they might not be the One True Way? You can see why they'd put up some resistance.
I think the only real answer for you right now is to accept their concerns as
theirs and not allow them to influence their happiness. The best persuasive argument will be time - the longer you and Hal are together and happy, the easier it will be for them to adapt. However, you have to prepare yourself for the possibility that they might never adapt. The best response will be for you to be completely compassionate about their concerns - let them know that you hear them, and that you love them no matter what, and that this doesn't mean that you are going to abandon them, but be firm in your commitment to live your own life on your own terms and find your own bliss.
Even though you probably can't change their minds through argument and reason, they may just change their minds on their own as time goes on. And that's what you need - to be patient and allow them to have their concerns, but not allow their concerns to be YOUR concerns.
Best of luck!