I don't know if you are serious or not, but I am in this post.
For rock climbing training, I do pull-ups using just my fingertips on top of door jams. Try to find wooden, three-quarter inch jams. My old house used to have them for every doorway in the house. Whenever I walk through a doorway, I pause and do between one and five pull-ups. This works very well. I can now do between one and three pull-ups on a half-inch metal jam every time. The metal jam was painful at first, but your fingers will become used to it if you persist.
A couple of tips:
1. Make sure the jam is well secured to the wall. <-- very important as to not have people come running over to find out 'what was that crash?'
2. Hand placement is very important. Much like doing push-ups, the further apart your hands are, the easier it is to pull up. Also, with a wider hand placement, you can get your thumbs up on top for extra grip.
3. Clean your hands and the top of the jams you will use. Slipping off causes a very painful 'snap'.
4. Trim your fingernails down. They don't help you grip. If they catch on the jam when you slip, it is very painful.
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Champagne for my real friends... and real pain for my sham friends.
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