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Actually, it's not abnormal that someone who is naturally shy would be more of a Domme than a subbie.
I can lead you towards some great books on being a Domme... The New Topping Book (which you can find at amazon.com or bn.com) is a great place to start. And there is also a book called The New Bottoming Book.
The Loving Dominant is another good book. So is The Art of Sensual Female Dominance: A Guide for Women (this one is by Claudia Varrin, an excellent author and source for D/s relationships).
When I come across other sites, I will let you know.
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