<div align="center">WHAT DOCTORS SAY, AND WHAT THEY'RE REALLY THINKING:
"This should be taken care of right away."
(I'd planned a trip to Hawaii next month but this is so easy and profitable that I want to fix it before it cures itself.)
"Welllllll, what have we here...?"
(He has no idea and is hoping you'll give him a clue.)
"We have some good news and some bad news."
(The good news is, I'm going to buy that new BMW. The bad news is, you're going to pay for it.)
"Let's see how it develops."
(Maybe in a few days it will grow into something that can be cured.)
"I'd like to prescribe a new drug."
(I'm writing a paper and would like to use you for a guinea pig.)
"If it doesn't clear up in a week, give me a call."
(I don't know what it is. Maybe it will go away by itself.)
"That's quite a nasty looking wound."
(I think I'm going to throw up.)
"Well, we're not feeling so well today, are we...?"
(I'm stalling for time. Who are you and why are you here?)
"I'd like to run some more tests."
(I can't figure out what's wrong. Maybe the kid in the lab can solve this one.)
"Do you suppose all this stress could be affecting your nerves?" (You're crazier than an outhouse rat.)
"There is a lot of that going around."
(My God, that's the third one this week. I'd better learn something about this.
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