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By all means tell your wife the truth! Lies in a relationship, even lies of omission are very painful. (I know, I lived with them for 11 years!)
If you are attracted to your friend, be honest about that too -- with yourself and your wife. If that is not an okay thing in your marriage, use this as a warning sign of a deeper concern or need and seek help. If it is okay in your marriage -- enjoy!
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If you can go deeply into lovemaking, the ego disappears. That is the beauty of lovemaking, that it is another source of a glimpse of god
It's not about being perfect; it's about developing some skill at managing imperfection.
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