Is marriage really all that it is cracked up to be?
Everywhere I seem to look, people are talking about the benefits of marriage. Their reasoning seems to based on sappy personal accounts rather than hard facts. Yet while people are gushing over how great marriage can be, the divorce rate in the United States is >50%. Huh? If marriage is really this wonderful, life-extending, healthy thing - then what's up with the numbers?
When it comes to women...
According to this article in Web MD, women are supposed to sleep better at night if they are happily married.
Sleep Is Sweet for Happily Married Women
Yet married women are on average 4 lbs heavier if they are married.
Married women '4lbs heavier than unmarried counterparts' - Telegraph
Then there's this scholarly article from 1997 that admits that while middle-aged and geriatric women are more healthy when married, young married women are less healthy than their single or divorced counterparts.
Marital status effects on health: are there differ... [Soc Sci Med. 1997] - PubMed result
Now about men...
A blogger for the NY Times is raving about how nagging in marriage is good for men.
The Nagging Effect: Better Health for Married Men - NYTimes.com
There was a scholarly article from 1996 that shows married men in their 20's and early 30's are less likely to be depressed.
JSTOR: An Error Occurred Setting Your User Cookie
Then there are these 6 benefits of marriage from Men's Health...
Quote:
The Benefits of Being Married
By: Anna Maltby, Men's Health
If you're susceptible to vice, find a wife. She'll save you from yourself—and improve your life—in a variety of ways. Notably, she'll . . .
1. Increase Your Pay
A Virginia Commonwealth University study found that married men earn 22 percent more than their similarly experienced but single colleagues.
2. Speed Up Your Next Promotion
Married men receive higher performance ratings and faster promotions than bachelors, a 2005 study of U.S. Navy officers reported.
3. Keep You Out of Trouble
According to a recent U.S. Department of Justice report, male victims of violent crime are nearly four times more likely to be single than married.
4. Satisfy You in Bed
In 2006, British researchers reviewed the sexual habits of men in 38 countries and found that in every country, married men have more sex.
5. Help You Beat Cancer
In a Norwegian study, divorced and never-married male cancer patients had 11 and 16 percent higher mortality rates, respectively, than married men.
6. Help You Live Longer
A UCLA study found that people in generally excellent health were 88 percent more likely to die over the 8-year study period if they were single.
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Here's the link:
Benefits of Marriage: Men's Health
So what do you think of this - do you see it as BS or does it ring true for your life?
A few questions for discussion:
Are you married? Happily?
What is your impression of marriage?
Do you think marriage could improve your life, or the opposite?
Is marriage necessary to obtain the benefits of a long-term monogamous relationship?
Do people view you differently depending on your marital status?
----------------------------------MY THOUGHTS----------------------------------------
Are you married? Happily?
I am happily married.
What is your impression of marriage?
Marriage is less necessary in modern society. That said, I like it. I can see how it wouldn't be for everyone, but I love coming home in the evenings to cuddles and a reason to cook good meals.
Do you think marriage could improve your life, or the opposite?
It has improved my life. But it has been a horrible curse for some of my friends, riddled with emotional abuse and scarring experiences.
Is marriage necessary to obtain the benefits of a long-term monogamous relationship?
Absolutely not... yet yes. All emotional and physical needs possibly fulfilled by a spouse could easily be met with a long-term partner. Socially, it's not viewed in the same light. Our relationship became more stable when we were married rather than living together, simply because those who interacted with us viewed us as a married couple.
Do people view you differently depending on your marital status?
Yes. I first noticed the difference with family. Tt and I had been together for years before we decided to get married, but my mother continually tried to set me up with "good young men" until Tt proposed. Tt's mother hated me with a passion until we were properly married, then somehow magically when we tied the knot she was ok with me. Then there is the professional sphere: married graduate students aren't invited to the same sort of parties as singles. Accommodations for travel are more easily made for my husband when he wants to accompany me for a conference, and it is assumed that he will attend general events. With his work, things are run a bit more conservatively and invitations to parties are often limited to immediate family, therefore I would not have been permitted to attend the company party if we weren't married.