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This is why there is a bolster of little dogs running down the middle of my bed even as I type. I have to go down make their tea in a bit. I had the love of my life and he died in 1993. I did try having relationships after, but ifs not good lying in bed with someone after doing the matress mamba and sobbing because you have been unfaithfull, or because you wish it were him instead, and you could rub his knees with your toes - because thats how far down your legs go when your heads share a pillow. My love would have been kicking me up the arse repeatedly over the years since - he used to say 'Life is for running at'.
I have had others who have broken and tried suicide - some succeeding. True I miss things like conversations - although we have them, they tend to be one sided. One does say 'Ah go-on-go-on-go-on - like Craggy Islands Mrs Doyle - and both over the want of tea.
Poetry - because I know you have been feeling a tad downturned at the mouth corners of late, I will divulge another secret of the ancients to you. - If men hear you having an asthma attack whilst under them, it gives them greater confidence as to their sexual prowess as they consider it to be like making a comment of a positive nature. In fact, the closer you get to 'drowning in air', the more they respond like amature thespians recieving flowers, cheers and accolades - its called 'basking in the glory' I think (bearing in mind on my thoughts - last week I tried to pay for the dogs drugs with a bus pass, and when I did pay I left them behind and drove the five or six miles home. If I had remembered to take my mobile, I would have gotten the calls from the surgery and turned back.)
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