Originally Posted by jewels

Having your eyes open is different than secretly invading someone's privacy. Put the shoe on the other foot.

As for sex partners, hell yeah. Go get tested together instead of taking someone's word for something like that. There's no reason to keep an eye out, get the facts. But if you're beyond that and considering commitment in the relationship, the foundation of trust is crucial.

And I do realize, OCM, that stuff happens. I'm sorry it happened to you and it will happen sometimes. But that doesn't mean you've started all other relationships snooping and mistrusting, does it?