Quote:
Originally Posted by Zeraph
I don't know, your needs sound pretty vanilla (i.e. not kinky) to me. Maybe she wants to be tied up, whipped, spanked, teased, roleplay, etc. but figured you'd take the lead on it and she's too shy to ask.
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The other way around. I explained to her in the beginning that I like the freak stuff. Like I said before, she said she was too and liked it a lot. I just went out and bought a TENS unit (electric shock) Spent well over 3 bills on it and have only used it with her once. She says she liked it but thats it, never used it with her after that.(I do use it by myself - I don't cheat). I did go out and buy whips, tie ups, other toys ,,,, only to be used once or twice and just sitting the rest of the time. I did try anal with her a few times, she says she just doenst want it, it hurts (thats fine by me, if she really doesn't care for it. but she says she has done it before). The one time I did get a finger in her ass during sex, she came all over the place and loved it but since then, nothing, she doesn't even want that anymore.
To answer other questions:
- At the start she was fine. We both went after each other. Was get'n good. Then it just stopped on her end.
- The stress and tiredness seem to happen whenever its good for her. Example: All through the week we can stay up to watch her new favorite show - Sparticas (sp?) untill 10:30 - 11:00pm, but like the other night, we go to bed 1.5 hours (8:30pm) early and not only do I not get the back rub I won in a bet but no sex again (we did talk that morning about doing a little something after work with the clothes she wore to work - keeping only her shirt, high boots on and nothing else).
- I would buy flowers and cards and keep the kid away and do things just for her. This was before and during/after the problems started. The stress stuff, well she didn't touch dinner,clothes, dishes and a lot of other things I did to help her destress. Intimancy shouldn't be the problem, we cudlle and relax together. She doesnt say anything about that.
- Don't think its a paycheck thing. BUT I do tend to spend my money more so on the one I'm with because I don't like materialistic (sp?) things and don't mind doing things for others. So it could be a little of that and thats what I'm worried about.
I don't know, my gut tells me to just call it quits and take some time to myself for a good while.
Other hand I don't want to be hasty and miss out on a someone just because they may be dealing with a problem that can be worked out. If this si the case, after a year and for months - it would be nice if she could talk to me about the problem, if there is one.