noodle

Everyone fits in a personality disorder of some kind if you look hard enough. They can only be diagnosed by a professional and they're dangerous labels because there isn't much treatement for them. We're all histrionic, narcissistic, borderline... you name it.

Sound like this woman has some serious boundary issues. You've got to pick your battles with your wife and set limits with the crazy lady. Which will be difficult. But labeling people is likely to cause more problems. You married into the crazy... now you're going to have to deal. You might need to sit down with your wife an have an open conversation about your feelings, should the time present itself, and if this isn't successful, you might just have to accept it.

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