Tilted Forum Project Discussion Community - View Single Post - My girlfriend tells me she's not a fan of oral sex

LaLa1 · 11-05-2010, 07:40 AM

Everyone here has already given you some great advice, from a woman I'd like to offer a couple more points that may be relevant.

First you keep referring to the initial conversation about oral. Could it be that she has an oral fixation and just wanted to make sure you would be comfortable with that? For me, giving head is something I really enjoy. I don't know why, but I do. However, receiving oral... meh, could take it or leave it. And it has absolutely nothing to do with my partner’s technique. When he does go down on me it's great, feels great, I have no complaints. But, it can be frustrating... which brings me to another point you made.

You said she like her clit rubbed "quite roughly"... I would guess regular oral for her is frustrating. There's not a lot of roughness involved with a tongue. For me, receiving oral can sometimes be frustrating, when I get aroused I want action. I want roughness, pinching, pulling, slapping, you get the drift? Sometimes just receiving straight oral makes me want to scream, get to the business already! Additionally, if she's a gusher or a squirter it may make her very uncomfortable for you to have your face down there. She may not be able to relax if she feels like she's going to soak you.

Now if you take into consideration all the points that Roguegypsy (hi baby) made about adding things to it. Play with her with your fingers, massage the area, add pressure, add fingers... yes, he is very correct in the statement of inserting fingers in her while giving oral. It drives some of us crazy! You'll probably receive a better response.

Also, part of it may be that she's a pleaser (like me). She may get off more on getting you off and sitting back and just allowing you to please her may be hard for her. Now, if she feels like it drives you crazy to play with her, she may be more able to relax and let you have your way. Also, if she submissive at heart and doesn't know how to voice that to you it may be that the act of fucking is more to her liking. The dominance that you show during sex may be what gets her off, and just straight oral from a guy isn't very dominant when it feels like it's for her and not for you, if that makes sense to you?

If it's really important to you, if you really really like giving then keep trying. Try different things, add different things to the mix like suggested above. See how she responds. If it's not that important to you, then just give her the things she says she wants and likes.

11-05-2010, 07:40 AM	#7 (permalink)
LaLa1 Upright Location: Birch Bay, Washington	Everyone here has already given you some great advice, from a woman I'd like to offer a couple more points that may be relevant. First you keep referring to the initial conversation about oral. Could it be that she has an oral fixation and just wanted to make sure you would be comfortable with that? For me, giving head is something I really enjoy. I don't know why, but I do. However, receiving oral... meh, could take it or leave it. And it has absolutely nothing to do with my partner’s technique. When he does go down on me it's great, feels great, I have no complaints. But, it can be frustrating... which brings me to another point you made. You said she like her clit rubbed "quite roughly"... I would guess regular oral for her is frustrating. There's not a lot of roughness involved with a tongue. For me, receiving oral can sometimes be frustrating, when I get aroused I want action. I want roughness, pinching, pulling, slapping, you get the drift? Sometimes just receiving straight oral makes me want to scream, get to the business already! Additionally, if she's a gusher or a squirter it may make her very uncomfortable for you to have your face down there. She may not be able to relax if she feels like she's going to soak you. Now if you take into consideration all the points that Roguegypsy (hi baby) made about adding things to it. Play with her with your fingers, massage the area, add pressure, add fingers... yes, he is very correct in the statement of inserting fingers in her while giving oral. It drives some of us crazy! You'll probably receive a better response. Also, part of it may be that she's a pleaser (like me). She may get off more on getting you off and sitting back and just allowing you to please her may be hard for her. Now, if she feels like it drives you crazy to play with her, she may be more able to relax and let you have your way. Also, if she submissive at heart and doesn't know how to voice that to you it may be that the act of fucking is more to her liking. The dominance that you show during sex may be what gets her off, and just straight oral from a guy isn't very dominant when it feels like it's for her and not for you, if that makes sense to you? If it's really important to you, if you really really like giving then keep trying. Try different things, add different things to the mix like suggested above. See how she responds. If it's not that important to you, then just give her the things she says she wants and likes.