Salem

I thought of making a poll but there are WAY too many options, so I'm just gonna spew them here and you can post to vote if you will.

I was watching GLEE last night when an interesting topic came up. One of the main characters, Kurt, is very, very gay. And he set his father up with the mother of a boy he used to like, Finn. So Finn and his mother end up moving into Kurt and his dad's house, which is small, so Finn and Kurt have to share a bedroom. Kurt decorates it trying to make it half manly, half girly, good for the both of them basically. And Finn does NOT take kindly to this, he starts saying it's "Faggy" yelling that he can't stand the Fag pillows and fag sheets and fag everything. Kurts dad walks down and hears this, and tells Finn that he can't use that word in this house. Finn tries to tell him he "Didn't mean it that way" and Kurt's dad says he knows, that he used to say it to, but that it's derogitory and it hurts his son whether he means it or not, and he wont allow it. So it got me thinking about terms.

I once called myself a dyke in front of my mother and sister and my mom was horrified. She thought it was a terrible word and that I shouldn't call myself that. I prefer dyke in all honesty. So.. what do you think of such terms? And why?

Do you think gay, fag, dyke, queer, are derogitory, acceptible, and in what situations? For example is someone says, "That is SO gay!" about a.. really glittery man purse, is that okay with you? If someone says the same thing about not getting their way, or about a situation that is less than favorable to them, is that okay? If someone calls a guy a fag in the locker room after he's just expressed a love for Lady Gaga, but is heterosexual, is that okay? If someone calls someone a fag, who is homosexual, is that okay? What about dyke? A girl wears her hair short, her overalls baggy and gets called a dyke, but is straight, has she been insulted, or just mis-judged?

Let's hear your opinions!! And they are all opinions, I don't want any bashing, you're all free to think and say what you want, that's why i asked for opnions.

In my opinion.. when someone says " That's so gay," or "How gay" when they havn't gotten their way, or however else that phrase is popular these days, I don't like it. I usually try to correct people by saying "Actually, I'm sure that the party you're at doesn't have a sexual orientation, even if it does suck" Which really, really, really anooys people, and I KNOW it does, but it makes them stop and think at least. If someone says "That's SOOO Gay" about something that I would classify as gay.... Drag, Glittery male attire, ect, Yeah I'm fine with it unless they mean it in a hateful way. As for Fag, I think fag being tossed around between members of the queer community is okay. If someone says, "Oh you're such a fag" in a playful funny way with a friend that IS gay, and they KNOW it's meant to directly as that, "You are so gay" then that's okay. I think when someone calls someone a fag as a put down, to emasculate them, that's not okay. The same with dyke. My friend T calls me a dyke on occasion when I get some particularily "dykey" attire, and we just laugh and chat about it. My brother in law often calls me his favorite dyke. And I laugh about it, and he laughs about it, and it's all a good time because I know how he means it and there's mutual understanding, it's not a put down it's kind of a positive thing, it's a comliment as far as I'm concerned. I've been accepted for who I am in a positive way. But in elementray school and highschool when people used to ridicule me calling me a dyke and a lesbian because i was a virgin who didn't have a boyfriend, yeah, that pissed me off. I had no idea i was gay, or I might have taken it differently, but I was FURIOUS everytime someone yelled, "LESBIAN" when I walked by, because I wouldn't put out.

Basically if it's meant as a put down, it's a put down, and I don't think it's nessecary, nor to I endorse it. If it's a mutual thing between any and all partys, fine, whatever. If it's a positive thing, a compliment, then great. That's my very thic two cents, let's hear yours.