Originally Posted by snowy

To the OP: Don't underestimate the power of just listening (and I mean really listening). Like Shani's husband, my SO just lets me talk and talk and talk (it isn't always bitching, though sometimes it is) and he listens without judgment. Although he is an engineer and always looking to solve a problem, he's come to understand that sometimes just letting me talk it out allows me to solve the problem.

I found a good outline of how to listen actively: Active Listening - Communication Skills Training from MindTools.com Active listening definitely makes it easier to listen and to overcome the barriers to listening (there are a lot of them).

Relationships aren't easy. My SO and I weren't born knowing how to communicate effectively with one another; it's something we've had to figure out and practice, practice, practice. Good communication will improve your relationship and reduce conflict. If you need more resources on effective communication in relationships, hit up your public library. I can guarantee they'll have a shelf of books on the subject, and an interest in improving your skills may catch your SO's eye and show that you really are invested in the relationship.