Wes Mantooth

I think this fits here, apologies if it belongs elsewhere.

So the one night stand. I was having a pretty good discussion at the bar earlier with some friends based off a fling I had earlier this weekend and we were kind of split on the "etiquette" of casual sex, particularly the aftermath. Some thought it was proper to spend the night and wake up together, others thought a phone call the next day was the right thing and still others agreed it was perfectly fine to leave and just walk away (I'm in agreement with the latter). We argued over the nature of the relationship, was it a friend? A complete stranger? Fuck buddy? Did it matter? Nobody could really agree on that either but we kind of agreed that with a friend it might be proper to stick around and iron out the situation while a stranger it was much more acceptable to walk away.

I'll give you my example as its what started the whole conversation, skip ahead a few paragraphs if your not interested. Honestly I'm not really entirely sure how to classify this situation in the first place...but it seems like a one night stand. I was out at an after party with a band I'd spent the weekend doing some shows with, we're all good friends and often times we don't get a lot of time to really visit. In this case I was pretty tired, not in the mood to be sociable and wound up heading out back, with Will (our singer), to an empty bedroom with a couple bottles of Jack just hoping for a quite visit and time for a little catch up.(Yeah I know what your thinking, this isn't about hot man love, keep reading) About an hour later a good friend of ours, Karen, burst through the door all hopped up on something or other, she immediately takes off her top, hops onto the bed and remarks "Feel em! They're spectacular!". Now I knew she was pretty F-ed up and when she started offering blow jobs, I actually turned her down (shes a good friend and well..next day regrets and such), kicked back on the bed and grabbed a magazine. Will wasn't quite so nice about the whole thing and took her up on the offer. So there she is butt naked, ass skyward, head under the sheets giving what looked to be spectacular head and I'm sitting on the other end of the bed reading Guns & Ammo and nursing a bottle of whiskey. A few minutes later she pokes her head up from under the sheets, looks at me and says "Go ahead, fuck me if you want to" before mumbling something about condoms in her pocket and going back to the task at hand.

Now at this point I thought about it and with condom in hand I took stock of the situation. I'd most likely be going at this from behind meaning that as I was in the throws of passion all I'd see when looking down was her hot ass and my buddies face etched with ecstasy. I put the condom down, grabbed my bottle of Jack and went back to the magazine...c'mon guys some things just can't be unseen. She finishes up, climbs over on top of me and whispers "you're the whole reason I came in here and I'm not leaving disappointed." Honestly folks, she's pretty hot and a guy only has so much self control. I thought fuck it, she straddles my lap, I unzip and we went to town, Will grabs the magazine, the the bottle of Jack, turns on some Iggy Pop and kicks back. We had a pretty good go around...actually it was...yeah, wow! She climbs off and lays down between us, mediates a joint passed back and forth and we just kind of relaxed, enjoyed some good music and a had a visit. Really we spent the next few hours discussing politics, well, as best we could in our state.

I sobered up, headed home and went to bed not thinking too much about what just happened. Later on Sunday morning, around 11:30 I get me a call, I woke, up rubbed the sleep out of my eyes and tried to figure out who I was talking too, it was Karen. "I didn't see you when I got up this morning and noticed you hadn't called...just wanted to see what was up." I'm trying not cough up a lung with my first morning smoke and said I'd had a good time but was tired and went home to get some sleep. "Oh" she replies "didn't want to stick around?". I told her I hadn't really thought about it and just...went home. She sounded kind of hurt by my answer, said to give her a call sometime and hung up. I did the only thing I could do after such a conversation...went back to bed.

I met up with my buddies later at the bar, Will included, who she hadn't called, apparently he went home too...yeah I don't know whats up with that. Anyway we got talking about the whole situation and the etiquette involved...hence deep discussion...hence the thread you're still reading now (bless you for getting this far) and the question at hand.

Now maybe I'm just an old fashioned romantic but I'm of the school of thought that says a drunken one night stand is just that, a one night stand. I get that emotions and such can get involved in these kinds of things but lets not get crazy here, there was no romance involved, it was just drunken casual sex. How much of a commitment are you supposed to make for something you didn't even ask for?

So discuss. One night stand, strings attached or freedom to just walk away? Does it matter who the person was and if so does that change the level of commitment? I'd love to hear what all of you think about it. Heck to spice up the thread share a few stories if you feel like it.

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