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13 years and 5 kids is a lot to throw away.
It's good that you're letting out, it can be hard if you feel like you have no-one to turn to. It's ok to feel angry, just don't let that consume you.
I don't know all the details of your story so I can't say what is right and wrong in how things ended up the way they have for you.
But it sounds like at the root of it is a high degree of incompatibility between you two. Maybe there was a time when she was willing to solve problems, and that you were not. Now maybe you are willing and she just wants out.
Without a context, all I can say is if you made a lot of sacrifices to be with her, and put up with a lot of selfish behaviour, perhaps it's better for you in the long run to separate.
Your kids are still yours to raise and nurture. It is a shame to have that many kids together and not be able to work it out.
When you are ready, you will move on. There will be another woman out there who will suit you better, and you her.
Good luck in this difficult phase.
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Whether we write or speak or do but look
We are ever unapparent. What we are
Cannot be transfused into word or book.
Our soul from us is infinitely far.
However much we give our thoughts the will
To be our soul and gesture it abroad,
Our hearts are incommunicable still.
In what we show ourselves we are ignored.
The abyss from soul to soul cannot be bridged
By any skill of thought or trick of seeming.
Unto our very selves we are abridged
When we would utter to our thought our being.
We are our dreams of ourselves, souls by gleams,
And each to each other dreams of others' dreams.
Fernando Pessoa, 1918
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