| 
				
				Sorority Girls
			 
 I kept this one shorter than the Mommy Mommy...
 
 1. Q: What do you say to a sorority girl that won't give in?
 A: "Have another beer."
 
 2. Q: Why does a sorority girl wear underwear?
 A: To keep her ankles warm.
 
 3. Q: What's the difference between a sorority girl and a Rolls Royce?
 A: Not everybody has been in a Rolls Royce.
 
 4. Q: What's the difference between a sorority girl and a toilet?
 A: A toilet doesn't follow you around after you use it.
 
 5. Q: What does a sorority girl put behind her ears to make her look more attractive?
 A: Her ankles.
 
 6. Q: What's the difference between a sorority girl and a bowling ball?
 A1: You can only put three fingers in a bowling ball.
 A2: You could eat a bowling ball if you had to.
 A3: You can't fit a sorority girl inside a bowling ball.
 A4: There is no difference. They're both round and have three holes to poke.
 
 7. Q: How are a bowling ball and a sorority girl alike?
 A: You can pick them up, stick your fingers in them, and throw them
 in the gutter and they'll always come back.
 
 8. Q: What is the difference between a sorority girls and hookers?
 A: Sorority girls cost less per score.
 
 9. Q: What is the difference between a sorority girl and an elephant?
 A: About 40 pounds.
 Q2: How do you equalize the two?
 A2: Feed the elephant.
 
 10. Q: What is the first thing a sorority girl does in the morning?
 A1: Introduces herself.
 A2: Walks home.
 
 11. Q: What's the difference between a sorority girl and the Titanic?
 A: Only 1500 went down on the Titanic.
 
 12. Q: How can you tell if a sorority girl has achieved orgasm?
 A: She drops her nail file.
 
 13. Q: What's a sorority girls favorite wine?
 A: "Daaaaaaady, I want to go to Mi-ammmmmmi."
 
 14. Q: What do you get when you cross a sorority girl with an ape?
 A: Don't know. There's only so much an ape can be forced to do.
 
 15. Q: Why is a sorority girl like a door knob?
 A: 'Cause everybody gets a turn.
 
 16. Q: How do you get a sorority girl in your bed?
 A: Grease her hips so she'll fit through the door, and throw a
 Twinkie on the bed.
 
 17. Q: Did you hear about the new sorority girl doll?
 A: You put a ring on her finger and her hips expand.
 
 18. Q: What's the difference between sorority girls and garbage?
 A: Garbage gets taken out once a week.
 
 19. Q: What do you call a 100 sorority girls bathing on a beach in Cuba?
 A: Bay of Pigs.
 
 20. Q: What do you call a sorority girl hang-gliding festival?
 A: Multiple total eclipses.
 
 21. Q: What is a sorority girls mating call?
 A: "I'm sooooooo drunk, I'm sooooooo drunk."
 
 22. Q: What's the difference between a sorority girl and a dog?
 A: Driver's will swerve to miss the dog.
 
 23. Q: How many sorority girls does it take to change a light bulb?
 A1: 1, she holds on to it, and the world revolves around her.
 A2: 2, one to hold the Diet Pepsi, and one to call Daddy.
 A3: 6, one to screw it in, and five to make T-shirts.
 A4: 7, one to change it, and six to go out and buy more Diet Pepsi.
 A5: 65, one to change it, and 64 to sing and clap.
 
 24. Q: Why is a sorority girl like railroad tracks?
 A: 'Cause she's been laid all over the country.
 
 25. Q: What three words will a sorority girl never hear?
 A: "Attention K-mart shoppers."
 
 26. Q: Why does a sorority girl close her eyes during sex?
 A: So she can fantasize about shopping.
 
 27. Q: What is a sorority girls favorite position?
 A: Facing Bloomingdale's.
 
 28. Q: What's the difference between sorority girls and Jell-o?
 A: Jell-o wiggles when you eat it.
 
 29. Q: What do you call a sorority girl's waterbed?
 A1: Lake Placid.
 A2: The Dead Sea.
 
 30. Q: How do you know when a sorority girl is a nymphomaniac?
 A: She'll make love the same day she had her hair done.
 
 31. Q: What's a sorority girl's idea of natural childbirth?
 A: No make-up.
 
 32. Q: How do you prevent a sorority girl from having sex?
 A: Marry her.
 
 33. Q: What's the difference between a sorority girl and a broom closet?
 A: Only two men fit inside a broom closet at once.
 
 34. Q: What's the difference between a sorority girl and a phone booth?
 A1: You need a quarter to use the phone.
 A2: Only one person can use the phone at once.
 
 35. Q: What's the difference between a sorority and a circus?
 A: A circus is a cunning array of stunts.
 
 36. Q: How is a sorority girl like a vacuum?
 A: They both suck.
 Q2: How are they different?
 A1: You can buy a new vacuum when you get sick of it.
 A2: You can buy a new vacuum when it no longer sucks.
 A3: When a vacuum cleaner is full of shit, it's easy to dump the old bag.
 A4: A vacuum cleaner can't suck a golf ball through a garden hose.
 A5: A vacuum cleaner can't suck start a Harley.
 
 37. Q: How do you get four sorority girls on one chair?
 A1: Tell them there is a rich guy sitting in it.
 A2: Turn the chair over, and put one on each leg.
 
 38. Q: What's the difference between a sorority track team and a tribe of sly pygmies?
 A: The tribe of sly pygmies are a bunch of cunning runts.
 
 39. Q: What does the Bermuda Triangle and sorority girls have in common?
 A: They've both swallowed a lot of semen.
 
 40. Q: What does a sorority girl make for dinner?
 A: Reservations.
 
 41. Q: Why does a sorority girl wear a gold diaphragm?
 A: So her boyfriend will think he's coming into money.
 
 42. Q: What did the sorority girl say when she knocked over the priceless Ming vase?
 A: "It's OK Daddy, I'm not hurt."
 
 43. Q: What's the difference between a prostitute, a nymphomaniac, and a sorority girl?
 A: A prostitute says, "Are you done yet?", a nymphomaniac says, "You're done already?", and a sorority girl says, "Beige... I think I'll paint the ceiling beige."
 
 44. Q: What's the difference between a sorority girl and a rooster?
 A: In the morning a rooster says, "Cock'll-doodl-doooo", while a sorority girl says, "Any-cock'll-doooo."
 
 45. Q: What do you call 24 sorority girls walking down the street?
 A: A case of Schlitz.
 
 46. Q: What is foreplay for a sorority girl?
 A: Thirty minutes of begging.
 
 47. Q: How does a sorority girl commit suicide?
 A: She gathers her clothes into a pile and jumps off.
 
				__________________Living is easy with eyes closed.
 |