Originally Posted by Shaindra

I disagree with "the talk". It's very likely that you'll either end up pissed and upset, or he'll say just enough to soothe you for now, but keep on without a real relationship.

He likes you. He likes hanging out with you. He especially likes being the only one fucking you. But seriously, when a man says he's not looking for a relationship, believe him until he says *and* shows otherwise. He'll take all the easy "relationship-y" things you provide, and he'll feel like he's being straight because, after all, he *told* you he wasn't in it for a relationship. It's not his fault that you read into the hanging out, enjoying time together and fucking as a relationship.

My opinion is that you really have just two choices, accept the status quo, or tell him calmly that you *are* looking for a relationship and you don't want to waste any more time or emotional energy with this situation. This is called a boundary. Boundaries are good things. It means you know what you want and more importantly, it means that you are *not* going to settle for less. If you can maturely state your boundary without criticizing his choices or making ultimatums and then *enforce* that boundary, you are lightyears ahead of your peers.