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I think that all of this deserves a hell of a lot more thought than you seem to be willing to give it.
Best way to nurse a broken heart? Move the fuck on. Do something. Build yourself as new a life as you can muster and focus on making yourself whole enough to be complete while alone. From your post above, I doubt very seriously that you'd be able to do yourself or any new relationship that you enter into any justice.
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"Porn is a zoo of exotic animals that becomes boring upon ownership." -Nersesian
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