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Ok, being active duty Army, I think I can empathize a little bit with what you're saying. In regards to the forum, I'm a little torn. On one hand, I completely know what you're saying, and understand how the family members might have felt their privacy was violated. But, as you said, the request was handled professionally. Even journalists are fallible, and as long as none of the private thoughts, stories, or feelings were published without consent, I'd say no harm no foul.
On the other hand, the other story, as a soldier, disgusts me. And I am a huge advocate of free press. While I can see how some people were disturbed with some prior photographs (especially those of caskets coming home), I understand the need of the media to report and bring the war back home. Especially since I for the most part think a lot of people have forgotten that we're over there, or stopped caring. But to so blatantly disregard the wishes of a family on such a personal matter, even when the Secretary of Defense himself came to them to clarify the grief it would cause, is appaling.
This isn't a matter of journalistic integrity. This is a matter or morality and common decency. This isn't responsible reporting, it's a case of an organization putting itself before the people it is supposed to be reporting to. I'm glad to hear that most organizations that draw their information from the AP chose not to publish, and I hope every employee of the AP is ashamed to be part of the organization right now.
As a side note, this is just one more argument against embedded journalists, which I've never liked.
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Veritas Vos Liberabit
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