Thngs were different back in the last century.
Before I was married and had my first child, I used to keep count. I didn't realize that I was looking to fill the proverbial hole in order to feel loved.
Now, I've tried to have empty casual sex a couple of times in the last ten years or so, but it's just so unfulfilling and empty. A few years ago, I had one friend with benefits (ooooooo!) but it was more fun than anything else because we knew one another so well.
For me, it's the intimacy, yes. But if I look at from a purely sexual perspective, I've found much greater ecstasy with men who know me, love me and care enough to learn what buttons to push, and when and how. It truly is making love that I crave.