This is a Ladies Lounge thread.
I realize this topic has been addressed before in various permutations. I feel that our dynamic has changed since it was last addressed. I'm curious how other women perceive their bodies. I'd like us to share advice and encouragement with each other.
Some questions to get you thinking - feel free to comment however you deem appropriate.
Here is a frank, unaltered, not necessarily flattering full-length photo of me
Here is my height and weight
I feel confident with my body when...
I do not feel confident with my body when...
I do/don't feel comfortable advising others on their body image
Sex makes me more comfortable/less comfortable with my body because...
My family impacted my opinion on my body because...
My friends impacted my opinion on my body because...
I have/haven't wanted to be thinner
I have/haven't dealt with an eating disorder
I feel I would be happiest if I weighed ________. This is why.
Weight doesn't impact my body image because ...
__________________________________________________________
Cadre got my thinking with her thread about wanting to be a personal trainer. It brought up questions about female body image - a woman's personal perception of her weight and how that contrasts with others' perceptions.
She mentioned that she is 5'3" and 107lbs. This is what started me thinking.
I'm 5'4" and 120lbs.
I have been approximately this height and weight since junior high, though my body shape has changed some over the years. Based on my blood pressure and caloric readings, physicians have told me numerous times that I need to eat more - that I should weigh closer to 135 for my body type. At one point I reached this target weight that they set for me. I was horrified and shot back down to 125 as quickly as possible. I have been accused numerous times of being anorexic, both by physicians and friends (I eat good portions. I run, do yoga and other stretches for exercise). I have been told that I'm too thin.
On the flip side, I have also been called fat. I have been told that I'm too heavy in ballet classes, that I need to slim down.
I become frustrated with these conflicting messages. I am what I am.
The one time I was really comfortable with my body weight was during a brief time in college when I was 110 lbs. But my mother and siblings were incredibly worried for my well-being when I was this weight. They begged me to put on 10 lbs. This hit me especially hard because my brother is a nutritionist/masseuse/karate instructor and he seemed the most concerned. So I put back on the weight and I haven't tried to lose it again.
Honestly, I keep thinking that it'd be nice to be 110 again. I keep thinking how nice it would be to feel lighter on my feet and to have no excess flab on my thighs. I enjoy exercising and would like to have a body that reflects the amount of exercise that I put in. I feel like my present weight is merely a reflection of my desire for my family to not disapprove.
This in mind, I realize I have started my own family. My husband and I have been married for nearly a year, and perhaps it is time I stopped focusing on pleasing my parents and siblings. My husband tells me he loves my weight, no matter what it is. He tells me that I'm beautiful. Our sex life is delightful. I feel more sexy when I am thinner. There are times of the month when I am more bloated than others, and when I feel bloated I feel less appealing. My husband never influences this feeling, though he claims he notices these fluctuations. He tells me when I look exceptionally thin, or when I'm not feeling thin he tells me that he loves my body's shape. I don't feel that I have to lose weight to please him. But knowing that I no longer have to please my immediate family, I wonder if I could lose those 10 lbs.