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1) I told her straight in the beginning of the relationship that I am in this to some day marry her
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What the hell? Well, what's done is done. If you end up in another relationship, don't say this at the beginning of it.
Getting married means filling out some legal paperwork and planning what should be the most romantic gesture of your life. Being married means you are legally bound to each other, making out wills, planning for retirement, taking out the garbage, checking each other for moles, caring day in and day out even when you don't feel like it, fighting, making up, doing something extra every now and then just to stay in her good graces, moving here and there, buying your first house together, and a million other things.
When people say it's just a piece of paper, well, that's a bunch of bullshit. There are countless intangibles that come about. I know people who aschew marriage and remain a happy couple for decades, but they're married whether it's on paper or not. It's funny, they talk about it being just a piece of paper, yet they have so many more legal documents dealing with estates, home ownership, health care....
At any rate, it doesn't sound like she knows what she wants, and I suspect she may be clinically depressed, but that's just some idiot on the internet thinking that. But it might be worth her while to check that out.