Quote:
Originally Posted by genuinegirly
I'm going to be honest here.
She's communicating.
You're not.
Start listening. Start talking.
She doesn't like getting nice expensive things? Don't give them to her.
Save the money for future needs.
She feels like you expect too much?
Share your appreciation for what she does. "Wow. Thank you so much for making the bed. I wouldn't have thought of doing that. You're better at this than I am."
Take this as an exercise in communication.
All those little things you observe but say nothing about?
Yeah, you need to start mentioning those.
Men get by on body language. Women need it vocalized.
Otherwise we're left floundering wondering what in the world you're thinking. And usually (sadly enough) we assume you're thinking we're not good enough.
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It could just as easily be argued that she's insecure and manipulative. I don't see where he's not communicating.
Relationships built on enabling the insecurities of the other party are doomed to failure.
Another "honest" approach here would be to tell him to find a more mature girl to have a relationship with.
I also disagree with the generalization that men get by on body language and women need it vocalized. I detest it when people do not come out and say what is on their mind. It's passive, manipulative, and childish.
The reality is that this relationship is doomed not because he's not communicating but because she's immature and unwilling to grow up enough to have an adult relationship.
This isn't a condemnation of her. I'm sure she's a very nice person, but she's not mature enough to handle a relationship yet.