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Old 12-12-2008, 06:03 PM   #5 (permalink)
savmesom11
Insane
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by grumpyolddude View Post
Finding what motivates you, personally, is a worthwhile endeavor. I realize that, for myself, I'm highly motivated by how my actions, or inaction, will affect those around me.
I am exactly this way. Maybe it is the social worker in me, but it is far more rewarding and motivating to accomplish a task that benefits others as well as yourself. Unfortunately I burn out or become disgruntled without proper self-care, so it is an area I have recently been paying more attention to.

In regards to birth order, my family could be described very similar to the posts above but the older we got, the more this changed. I am the youngest of three girls, all of whom were raised by a dominant female figure. Today the oldest has a 10th grade education, 4 children with 3 different men, is on her second marriage, and has never held a job longer than 2 years. My middle sister was always the organized, responsible, self-motivator. She thrived on order, always looked her best, and was always the most relied upon of us three. Today she is in her mid-thirties with 1 young son, she graduated from trade school (AAS in Accounting) when she was 20 and basically stopped there. She has never advanced her career through education or further training, never invested in owning her a home, or demonstrated any other kind of financially responsible behavior; but she still dresses in Prada, you could eat off her kitchen floor and her house smells like a garden.

Then there is me, the baby. As a grade school kid I was baaad! Always in trouble and mom was always getting a phone call from the principal. By the time I was a teen-ager she was entirely too worn out. I basically had a free pass to do as I pleased, but some where deep within me was the fear factor. The fear factor kept me from the real dangerous stuff: drugs, violence, involvement with the police but I still ended up pregnant my senior year of high school. I had a few issues with rebellion in my twenties but managed to put myself through college twice, buy my own home at 23, and advance my career steadily.

For me the motivation was wrapped around being the youngest. I watched my mother and sisters settle for the same mediocre life and figured out early that I would never be that way. I could never imagine waiting for the right man to come along and rescue me, I would never accept poverty was God’s plan for me, and most important to me; I refused to be another statistic.

Now the tough stuff has always come easy for me but I haven’t put laundry away in weeks!
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* I do not believe that struggles are a sign of life falling apart, but rather a step of life falling into place. *
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