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(preamble: This hits home. Hard. Today is one month since mom passed away. I will try to remain civil.)
Skutch, is there any reason, other than age and lack of stamina that makes you believe that your grandmother is "dying?" Others have asked, but you don't have to answer us. You must answer this to yourself, seriously.
What's grandmother's living condition? Is she in a nursing home? Assisted living? With a relative? Does she have the freedom to come and go as she pleases, or can arrange an escort for? Does she spend extended periods of time alone and/or inactive? How often is she with friends and family?
Your grandmother needs the things that every person needs. She needs to spend time with people she loves and who love being with her. She needs to be doing and sharing the things that bring her joy. She needs to feel needed, stimulated, cherished and respected. She needs to believe that her life still has purpose.
So what if she gets a little tired? Let her take a catnap. Her friends will understand and accept. Do things in smaller doses, or plan breaks. Enlist other family members to take part in outings, if only for lunch, or to a park.
These last four years of my mother's life were fully packed, even as she slowed down. There were ballgames, dance recitals, trips to the casino, weddings... and funerals, birthday parties, luncheons, and on and on...
Mother was fortunate. There were many of us to share time with her, and she was able to live semi-independently, although we never had to leave her alone. I hope things can be as good for your grandmother.
__________________
"Regret can be a harder pill to swallow than failure .With failure you at least know you gave it a chance..." David Howard
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