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The right time to start having sex is... seventeen.
Seriously, though, doesn't the right time to have sex depend more on how much and what kind of time you share with your partner? All else being equal, if you find yourself spending lots of time together virtually or in RL, I'd think it natural to move on to the slippery bits a little sooner than if you only went out to dinner and a movie every Saturday and didn't talk much in between.
The longest I waited was about three months after we met, after three widely spaced dates and significant online conversation. The shortest was three days after we met, after a couple of late-night chat-by-the-register sessions at work. For me, I tend to wait longer to have sex with confident, intellectual women. It's definitely not for lack of attraction and it's definitely not just them driving the delay. It's more about seeing more of a relationship to develop outside of bed, and learning my way around their biggest sex organ before playing with the smaller ones.
There are also ties back into my answer to the "withholding sex" thread -- leaving them wanting more works both ways. That's a pretty recent discovery on my part, though. Historically, my median has been nearer the second date.
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