genuinegirly

We have had several threads discussing Birth Control in the LL, but I'm interested in seeing how this weighs out in the general TFP population.

The following questions are in place to stimulate discussion. For this reason, some questions are harsh and personally probing. Only answer the questions with which you are comfortable.

Why have you chosen your method(s) of birth control?
- Did expense weigh in on your decision?
- Does it work well with your lifestyle?
- Did a physician recommend this method?
- How long have you used this method?

Are you in a committed relationship?
- Would your birth control choice change if you moved your relationship to another level?
- Did you choose your birth control method based on your level of sexual activity?

Are you not in a committed relationship?
- Are you afraid to commit because of some fear of family or commitment?
- Do you feel it is best to confuse your life by bringing a child into a relationship that may not continue?

Are you using birth control for quality of life, health or financial reasons?
- Is your income so low you do not feel you could provide a child with a healthy quality of life?
- Are you opposed to the idea of feeding a family with food stamps, WICK, or other government programs?
- Would having a child interfere with your career or chosen lifestyle?
- Do you have mental or physical health issues that lead you to believe you would be an unfit parent?
- Are you (or your lover) on medications that require prescribed birth control?
- Would you pass along a known genetic disorder if you were to reproduce?

If you are beyond child-bearing years:
- What methods of birth control were available to you when you were 18-35?
- What is your opinion of current birth control methods?

Thank you for your thoughts!

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My Response
Before marriage, we used condoms, spermicide and the rhythm method. I suppose it is an odd combination. We used condoms + spermicide during the few days each month when I was especially fertile, condoms the rest of the time. Why have you chosen your method(s) of birth control? Expense. We have (and had) poor health insurance that does not cover birth control.

Are you in a committed relationship?
Yes we are married. We changed birth control methods (some to essentially none) when we were married.

Our first two months of marriage we made no attempts at birth control. I did not become pregnant. I started charting so I can show my charts to a fertility specialist when we want to have children. Our current plan - if we do not have a child on our own in the next five years, we will see a specialist. We are financially able to support a child. We feel we can provide a loving environment. This said, we wouldn't mind completing a PHD (me) and MBA (him) before embarking on parenthood. With a potential worldwide depression on its way, we've become more interested in waiting. The past few months, our discussion has gone like this: "Well, it's the day. What do you think?" After some discussion we have chosen to either abstain or withdraw. If for whatever reason we become pregnant with this method, we agree that it will be ok.

In our wedding vows we committed to welcome any life. We would like to be parents.

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"Sometimes I have to remember that things are brought to me for a reason, either for my own lessons or for the benefit of others." Cynthetiq

"violence is no more or less real than non-violence." roachboy