anti fishstick

When I was young, I was always the follower and felt like people's shadows. I have always struggled with feeling dependent, and needy throughout my life. I lived with my parents up until I was 22, and the day after I graduated, I moved in with my boyfriend. I have never lived alone and am starting to realize that this would be valuable experience for me I wish I had... I still live with my boyfriend and things have been tough. Naturally, I found someone that is very independent and needs freedom and space, and I am realizing that this is something I really want to have for myself as well.

My question is, how do you become more independent while still in a relationship? I cannot even fathom that at all right now. I've been trying to do more things for myself, like finding friends to hang out with, and doing things for myself (i'm training for a half marathon), but I still have needy energy. I'm not sure what to do right now....

Any thoughts or personal experiences would be helpful.

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And the day came when the risk to remain tight in a bud was more painful than the risk it took to blossom.
~Anais Nin