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Old 09-01-2008, 04:57 PM   #12 (permalink)
snowy
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Location: Oregon
Quote:
Originally Posted by genuinegirly View Post
Your friend is an adult. His medical records are private and should remain so.

Telling his parents may not be necessary or beneficial. If they are controlling or abusive in any way, this could become a bad situation. Perhaps the perceived distance between his family and you is the reason why he contacted you and not another friend.

Informing his school - really? What are they going to do? Universities should not be in the habit of policing substance abuse problems.

Your friend is an adult. He needs to be treated as one. You need to speak with your friend and tell him that you are concerned. That's it. Inform him of the services available to him. If you look into exactly what is available to him at his university within walking distance, and make things seem very easy, then he's more likely to do something about it. If you really see the need to spread the news to all friends and family, go for it. If he has anything like my background, he probably won't confide in you anymore if you choose that path.
I had a friend commit suicide in college. No one on campus knew he was in trouble--his girlfriend in Florida was the one he communicated his cry for help to. She hemmed and hawed about calling someone; by the time she did, it was too late. He hung himself from his dorm room bed.

Therefore, yes, absolutely the OP should let someone on campus know, but not just anyone the OP can get ahold of, and he shouldn't mention any names until he gets ahold of that person. Letting someone on campus know--someone who can actually do something, like a counselor or resident hall staff (if he's in a dormitory)--is more important than letting his family know, certainly.

I'm sorry, genuinegirly, but this is more than a substance abuse problem, especially the way he worded the message, and that's why someone on campus should be alerted as to his mental condition.
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