Quote:
Originally Posted by jewels
Whoa!! Careful there. How do you go from this to that? Just so ya know, I enjoy my vibrator. But it's oh-so-much better (and much faster) when my guy uses it on me.
Could this be your issue? How do you know she's used to being with someone that knows better than you? Maybe no one's ever communicated and she doesn't even know. Has she told you that anyone else is better than you? Maybe she's afraid to tell you because she doesn't think you'd be receptive to her response(s). This is your opportunity to learn together. Don't pass the buck.
Ahem. Communication is a two-way proposition. If it's her problem, it's yours.
Ask them at the right time and the right way. Does this feel good? How about when I do this? You can get her to open up by indicating what feels good to you. Oooh babe I love when you do it like this. You get the idea.
|
Well, apparently we both suck at using her vibrator on her because neither one of us could manage it last night (I've done it before though.)
And yes, she has said directly that other guys have pleased her better. She didn't just come out and say it, but it has come up during our sex discussions. And I'm not passing the buck, I'm just saying that I feel like I'm working towards making our sex better, but she isn't. I realize it takes effort on both our parts, but I don't feel like she's making the same effort that I am.
Also, if I felt like this wasn't my problem too, would I be posting here about it? Don't take my words out of context...
Anyway, I've actually tried that approach on several occasions and generally I get a moaned "mmmhmmm" no matter what I'm doing. It's like she doesn't want to tell me if something isn't working for her for fear of frustrating me.