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I take the grin-and-bear-it approach with my future MIL. She lives in the same town as we do, and so we have to see her/put up with her quite a bit. She is kind of an odd duck.
Fortunately for me my own mother does not care for my FMIL, and so I have her to vent to when my FMIL pisses me off. It makes it easier to grin and bear it. She's one of those people that wants to be in control of the situation at all times, even if it's not her situation to control, and she wants people to do exactly as she says. Unfortunately for her, I'm my own person. For instance, I recently graduated from university, and she was insistent on the fact that she wanted to throw me a graduation party. But given the circumstances of my graduation (2 years later than I was supposed to because of illness, and I'd already celebrated once with my family), I said no. When I tried to meet her halfway and invited her and my FFIL to brunch with us to celebrate, she "forgot" and didn't show up. She is pretty damn passive-aggressive, but I just grin and bear it--and then bitch to my mother. There really isn't much else I can do.
I would suggest finding someone close to you who is prepared to listen to your venting about your MIL. It helps--a lot.
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If I am not better, at least I am different. --Jean-Jacques Rousseau
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