Honestly, I really don't know what it means to be feminine. I've often wondered what I'll do if I end up having daughters, because I won't have the slightest idea of how to raise them as "women"--I was always a tomboy, hated all the usual female things as a child, and my dad was more of a role model than my mother ever was. So I'll raise both sons and daughters as people, not genders--because I don't know how to do that, and I don't want to do it, anyway. I'll teach them to do all the things that I know how to do (including take care of car and house fixing), and hope that ktspktsp will also teach them what he knows how to do (including cooking).
The two times where I feel that I have really been "feminine" were my high school prom and my wedding day. The two times where I really WANTED to wear a big poofy dress and look like a "woman," and put real effort into it. But otherwise, I don't really think about it, and I don't think it's very relevant to my day-to-day life. I have to make sure that I wear earrings every day and put on a little bit of make-up, because I feel like I appear too masculine (to others) without those things--but if it were up to me, I wouldn't change anything about my appearance on a daily basis, just as men don't.
I know that my husband likes it when I dress and look a little more feminine--and sometimes I do it, but it's not a standard for me. The times when I recognize my womanhood the most are when I'm naked, and I can really appreciate my body for what it is, and I know how well it compliments a man's naked body.
But otherwise, I just don't really think of myself as "female"--more like asexual, as Little Tippler said.