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How feminine do you feel?
Ok, that's a charged question, I know.
Feminine, what is that anyway? Feminine to you is probably different from feminine to me.
according to the Merriam-Webster Online dictionary, femininity is:
"the embodiment or conception of a timeless or idealized feminine nature."
So when we feel feminine, does it mean we feel more ideal in other peoples' eyes (or even our own)?
So what do you think makes you feel feminine, or not?
I'm actually not sure what makes me feel that way. I know what superficial things make me feel feminine. Is that all it is? Wearing a pretty dress, high heels, make up, showing off your body? What psychological manifestations exist that could make women feel more feminine?
And back to the original question - on any given day, how feminine do you feel?
For me, I do generally feel feminine, but there was a time when I didn't feel feminine at all. To this day, that feeling still follows me a lot of the time. Like I'm a fraud really. Or I'm not myself. I'm not sure you will understand.
I know how to act feminine. I know that sometimes it feels real. But then a lot of the time I feel like I'm role-playing. I don't know why it doesn't come naturally to me. Though I'm happy that it seems to have improved with age and I feel like I'm more confident that, yes, that is a real part of me. It's a lot to do with confidence.
On some days, I feel asexual. Like just a body and mind, with no assigned gender. Existing. Yeah I get weird sometimes. Heh.
Do you think that in recent times a lot of women have forgotten or don't know how to be "girly", or "feminine? It could be because our mothers no longer teach us the things they used to. I mean I like to be on almost equal ground to men, but then I keep thinking I'd love to exude femininity and still have that, but it doesn't feel possible.
Is this all just social conditioning? I suspect as much.
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Whether we write or speak or do but look
We are ever unapparent. What we are
Cannot be transfused into word or book.
Our soul from us is infinitely far.
However much we give our thoughts the will
To be our soul and gesture it abroad,
Our hearts are incommunicable still.
In what we show ourselves we are ignored.
The abyss from soul to soul cannot be bridged
By any skill of thought or trick of seeming.
Unto our very selves we are abridged
When we would utter to our thought our being.
We are our dreams of ourselves, souls by gleams,
And each to each other dreams of others' dreams.
Fernando Pessoa, 1918
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