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Originally Posted by Cynthetiq
It's not your responsibility how someone acts or responds to a situation. It is a losing bet always if you tie your own self to that.
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Right... and that's a lesson that was passed on to me via counseling, and I've intellectualized it pretty well, but still have a hard time internalizing it emotionally. I can give other people great advice about this kind of thing, of course--but for myself, not so much. I notice it so much more in Iceland than anywhere else--and I do think that's the major reason why I don't have a real drive to stay here. That sense of failure from my (perceived) responsibility exceeding my (perceived) authority.
Quote:
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Originally Posted by Cynthetiq
Looking at how some societies deal with death is interesting. Jews, Chinese, and Italians have a finite mourning period. It is exacting and deliberate. It helps create acceptance. It demarks rituals, milestones, and situations in order to facilitate acceptance of the passing of another.
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I am indeed a big fan of rituals, even religious ones, for this reason--I think it's wise to allow the human spirit to grieve for a set time period, and then to decidedly move on, even if you aren't quite feeling healed up yet. How to create these kinds of rituals in a secular setting, where no single culture dominates? I think that it is for reasons like these that organized religion isn't going out of style anytime soon.