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Originally Posted by Pogue Mahone
And from what I can tell, he treats her like hell. He's verbally abusive (potentially physically, too) and treats her like nothing more than just tits and a uterus.
One of the biggest issues right now is that she doesn't want to feel like she's cheating on this guy.
She wants out of the relationship, but she doesn't want to completely crush the guy
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Okay, if you haven't already let her know what an awesome person she is for not wanting to cheat on the guy, tell her that.
Also treat her like a queen and she'll slowly realize that she likes that better than being treated like shit.
When talk of leaving Mr. Ass comes up and she expresses concern for his feelings remind her of his lack of concern for her feelings through the way he talks to her and treats her. If he doesn't care about her feelings, she doesn't need to care about his.
And also know that part of the not breaking up problem may be a fear of his reaction, maybe she's worried he'll get pissed and beat the shit out of her, especially if he gets wind of you.
If you talk her into breaking up with him, have her do it over the phone (typically over the phone is not cool, but with abusive SO it is important) and maybe be there with her to hold her hand and quietly encourage her while she does it.
Just my opinion, take it or leave it, you gotta do what's right for you. Oh and FYI she may have told your buddy to stay out of it, so maybe that's why he ain't talking.