Pogue Mahone

Alright. So I've been trying to figure this out by myself for a little bit, but I've ran into a wall. So, I come to you all for help.

A month ago, the bassist for my band came up with the idea to set me up with his sister-in-law. She's trying to get out of a bad relationship and he figured that if she finds a decent guy that it'll provide enough of an incentive for her to leave him. And from what I can tell, he treats her like hell. He's verbally abusive (potentially physically, too) and treats her like nothing more than just tits and a uterus.

So, we've hung out a couple of times now. And I really like her. And she really likes me. I think that if given the chance, this could turn in to something amazing. But the thing is, I don't know how to say it without seeming too overbearing. One of the biggest issues right now is that she doesn't want to feel like she's cheating on this guy. She wants out of the relationship, but she doesn't want to completely crush the guy (which I find amazing in it's own right), and I don't want to put any needless pressure on her. I also don't know whether or not I should confide in the bassist on this. I've tried to push conversations toward this topic a couple of times, but he usually just tries to change the subject. I also don't know whether or not I've been looking too far into this.

I know that it may not seem like much of a deal to some here, but this is the first time that I've been in a situation like this. Any advice?

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I still wave at the dots on the shore
And I still beat my head against the door
I still rage and wage my little war
I'm a shade and easy to ignore