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She may still be in to you but the ball is entirely in her court. Most here will urge you towards honesty and as she must know already that you were really getting something out of your car - honesty would probably serve you best.
And as for the friends at the party, sounds like your crush was quite the terrible hostess and that you need to relax. It's tough enough meeting new people in any setting and when they aren't welcoming things only become that much more difficult.
It's not about your backgrounds, your pastimes or your S.A.T. scores - it helps to remain flexible in those situations but there's only but so much you can do. Next time I'd try going to the person who organized the event and have them make it so that everyone is properly introduced and comfortable enough to mingle.
And something tells me that while you're from NY you aren't from NYC.
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"Porn is a zoo of exotic animals that becomes boring upon ownership." -Nersesian
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