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Originally Posted by terrahurtz
I see. Yup, I agree with the points you guys make -- that you just gotta step over that hill, dont look back, go for it, and basically you gotta just try it out.
What's funny is yesterday i went to speak to a counselor and he told me that he felt that I was taking an all-or-nothing approach to life -- academics, relationships, friendships, life in general. He also said I was a perfectionist.
This relates to the thread because I posted the original quote because even though I know its a prudish, "dumb" stance, I had at points felt in agreement. For me, its mostly because none of the girls I meet who I actually can date (the ones that actually show an interest in me instead of simply blowing me off with excuses) are actually ever up to my standards taht I would want to try something more with them..
You guys say that you should just step forward and move ahead and give it a try -- but obviously this is assuming you feel ALOT of initial attraction towards the girl. For me, its always the girls who I don't have much attraction who are attracted to me. And moving ahead and giving it a try with these girls, I feel that its just a disaster to begin with. Why step out and try if you see the end in sight already? But here I have already warped you guys' points.. you refer to the ones you are highly attracted to, to begin with, right?
Or, is it part of my "all-or-nothing" approach to life that even makes me believe there's an "end" in sight, with the girls i dont find up to my standards? or am i just being pragmatic in a good way.. hmmm
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The day I met QW, she was sitting in the student union with a friend who had long, beautiful dark hair, a slender, bombshell body and a dazzling smile. I had met the friend once before, and was immensely attracted to her. She felt none of that towards me, as it turned out, although we did become good friends.
While I initially sat with them to pursue my ill-fated flirtations with the friend, what really happened was that I made the acquaintence of the sweetest person I'd ever met, and who had almost none of the physical "requirements" that I had convinced myself that I couldn't do without. She was less tall, had shorter hair, was more shy and self deprecating than anyone I had ever been with. She wore glasses, had a minor case of acne, and was struggling to lose a few last pounds. She must have been around the campus, but I never did, nor imagined that I would have, given her the first notice. She didn't fit my "standards."
"Marge" did me the biggest favor of my life: She blew me off! And because of that, I found the greatest treasure of my life! My wonderful, precious QW. (Dammit, terrahurtz, ya got me blowing my cover! I'm the "grumpyolddude," fer kristsakes!)
Do yourself a solid. Stop chasing the "trophy" girlfriend quite so exclusively. Certainly, one or two of those girls who show an interest in you aren't total, hideous ogres. You don't have to make a commitment. Just play nice and get to know them a bit. Show your socialble side. You might find a diamond in the rough.... or she may have a really hot friend
