In one survey, 57 percent of adults admit to flirting online. We live in an age of instant and discreet communication. We are human, in that we are imperfect and impulsive.
IMO, our reactions to being "cheated on", by a partner are more about us, than about our partner. We can set standards high enough....for other people.... to increase the certainty that we will end up alone, with no ongoing risk of sudden disappointment....we can live it 24/7, in a small and constant dose, of "aloneness".
We all have to do much growing, emotionally, throughout our lifetimes. Draw a line in the sand, set all the immovable standards you wish, for yourself. If you impose them on others, you set yourself up for the disappointment that follows.
Is it an accident that literature and stage and movie drama are replete with stories of infidelity and amorous intrigue? Are you or your partner different enough to be exempt from all of the situations befalling the actors and characters? Also, aren't the lives of prominent artist, actors, politicians, and other ambitious people, seemingly accompanied by stories of adultery and other example of infidelity?
Is it because of ambition, opportunity, narcissistic personality.....or is it just a part of living life to a fuller degree, than less prominent or accomplished people?
Is refusing to give in to every inappropriate urge that comes up, LIVING? Is your partner so unlike you that they cannot understand, at all, how it could happen, to consider making an allowance for it? Are you so unlike them? Why are you with each other, then?
It isn't easy to resist all temptation. Is it worth it? Is what is left, after all is resisted, LIVING?
In hindsight, cheating is always regarded as destructive, even irrational behavior, but much less often, in realtime. One LIVES one's life. Living does not always mean following the predictable or the wisest path.
Collectively, we are becoming more conservative, in so many ways. We take a dimmer view on infidelity than we do on war mongering.....why?
Quote:
...What is known: More Americans today (80 percent) say infidelity is "always wrong" than in 1970 (70 percent). And a full 99 percent of Americans say they expect their spouse to be faithful. Monogamy, at least as an ideal, is stronger than ever in this country even as it slips elsewhere.
Most people would consider that good news. But some sex therapists are having doubts. In Mating in Captivity, author and family therapist Esther Perel argues that the grip of fidelity may be doing more harm than good.
Noting record divorce rates, she writes "despite the fact that monogamy is a ship sinking faster than anyone can bail it out, we continue to cling to the wreckage with absolute faith in its structural soundness."
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