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You need to figure out the root of your jealousy. It could be many things:
1) Your wife and you have been together for 9 years. Maybe you would have some feelings of insecurities since your love has moved on to other levels. New loves have that butterfly feeling that is special and exciting, but fades over time.
2) You want to be with someone else and find it unfair that she's having all the fun?
3) Do you think that S's fiance is getting any action? I understand your agreement, but this idea could still lurk in the back of your head even if it is unfeasible.
4) You have developed feelings of attraction for S and are jealous of your wife for being with her?
5) Do you think that your wife will leave you for S? Even though you mentioned that she said she never would, it doesn't mean that you truly believe it.
Those are a few rhetorical questions. Just some things for you to ponder and discuss if you deem necessary to help you along.
It seems like you (as a couple) have approached the situation in a mature and safe manner. However, no matter how many books you read, discussions you have, or how strong a relationship is trouble can still arise. Nothing is perfect. I hope that you can look in yourself and come to terms with your jealousy. It's an ugly beast and is often irrational which makes it tough to conquer.
__________________
Whatever did happen to your soul?
I heard you sold it
Choose Heaven for the weather and Hell for the company
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