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medlar · 03-04-2008, 10:32 AM

This has been argued and speculated and maybe even proven wrong. There are plenty of single mums that do a fine enough job with raising their kids to be responsible members of society..In an ideal world you have both a mother and father. This is not an ideal world though.

What are the most important issues in raising a boy? Do boys need a father figure in their life? Why would a boy become resentful of this if he does not have this. He see the mother is under-estimating how important this is.

The mother's resentment of him will not gain any respect toward her from her son. If she withholds information he will always have questions about who he is. Does he have a right to know or is it the mother's choice. Could he ultimately take her to court and demand this from her for his own health reasons.

A father figure is to show masculinity and knowledge from his own expereinces to guide his son. a strong figure to look up to and learn from.and to acknowledge certain "rites of passage" that couldn't be shared with a mother. Do you think a boy will act out more without him in his life? Like turn to vandalism, drugs, sex at an early age?

I understand that any father of a daughter will want some information about the boy she's seeing..I had an awkward moment with my gf's father one painful dinner at her house. He was asking me all manner of questions. Most I could answer I think to his satisfaction..like part reason on why Im in canada and finishing school..but I couldn't give him answers to questions that really weren't his business concerning my immediate family (consisting of myself and my mum whom I no longer live with..and it went seriously downhill. I sensed he though me less of a person for his daughter. There has always been something missing and it was suddenly a difficult moment to glibly say he wasn't in my life. This once again raised the usual questions and resentments and I though it would be interesting to see how other people here might see how important or not a father figure in a boy's life is. I can take both sides agreeably, but in my heart I think a boy is missing out on a lot of important moments in his life. And whether this affects me later on in adulthood as a father especially..or even now in a relationship.

Give me your views if you please. Thanks

03-04-2008, 10:32 AM	#1 (permalink)
medlar Tilted Location: In this flesh and bone thing	Paternal questions. This has been argued and speculated and maybe even proven wrong. There are plenty of single mums that do a fine enough job with raising their kids to be responsible members of society..In an ideal world you have both a mother and father. This is not an ideal world though. What are the most important issues in raising a boy? Do boys need a father figure in their life? Why would a boy become resentful of this if he does not have this. He see the mother is under-estimating how important this is. The mother's resentment of him will not gain any respect toward her from her son. If she withholds information he will always have questions about who he is. Does he have a right to know or is it the mother's choice. Could he ultimately take her to court and demand this from her for his own health reasons. A father figure is to show masculinity and knowledge from his own expereinces to guide his son. a strong figure to look up to and learn from.and to acknowledge certain "rites of passage" that couldn't be shared with a mother. Do you think a boy will act out more without him in his life? Like turn to vandalism, drugs, sex at an early age? I understand that any father of a daughter will want some information about the boy she's seeing..I had an awkward moment with my gf's father one painful dinner at her house. He was asking me all manner of questions. Most I could answer I think to his satisfaction..like part reason on why Im in canada and finishing school..but I couldn't give him answers to questions that really weren't his business concerning my immediate family (consisting of myself and my mum whom I no longer live with..and it went seriously downhill. I sensed he though me less of a person for his daughter. There has always been something missing and it was suddenly a difficult moment to glibly say he wasn't in my life. This once again raised the usual questions and resentments and I though it would be interesting to see how other people here might see how important or not a father figure in a boy's life is. I can take both sides agreeably, but in my heart I think a boy is missing out on a lot of important moments in his life. And whether this affects me later on in adulthood as a father especially..or even now in a relationship. Give me your views if you please. Thanks Last edited by medlar; 03-04-2008 at 10:35 AM..