|
Just because your gf continues to allow her mother to influence her life doesn't mean that you have to allow her to influence yours. Bluntly speaking tell her so, don’t walk on eggshells you owe her nothing. You can go at it a couple of ways, nicely as Will says, "Your behavior toward me is unacceptable, if you continue to behave this way I no longer wish to share my time with you." Or not so nicely: Your manipulative attitude disgusts me, I tolerate you only for gf’s sake, don’t give me advise or even feel compelled to make small talk with me as I have no interest in being cordial with you any longer.” She doesn't need to be welcome in your home either if she is going to insult you and she certainly doesn't need to be included in your activities. The hurdle you will really have to focus on once you have separated yourself from her will be to not be consumed by the problems she and your gf have because unfortunately the gf is enabling the behavior. Although you will definitely have to sit down with the gf and explain that you don’t want your relationship to suffer because of her mother, that you are there for her because you love her and she will be your wife but she needs to respect your decision to sever ties. I am a firm believer in your parents are only responsible for who you are until your 18, after that it is up to you to decide who you want to be and what you will become. Your father is a perfect example of this.
__________________
* I do not believe that struggles are a sign of life falling apart, but rather a step of life falling into place. *
|