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Ustwo · 02-21-2008, 07:49 AM

There is one quality I've noticed among men who have gone from the still youngish single stage to the old and pathetically alone and willing to settle for anything stage, and that is while they were youngish and single they were always looking for that perfect girl to marry.

But for some reason it never worked out, never found that perfect one, or if they did, that one didn't want them. Pretty much no one was ever good enough for them in their eyes.

The problem is people do over think their relationships. They look at stuff thats not important and treat it like its very important.

My rule for dating and relationships would be.

#1 Do you have fun with the person.
#2 Do you want hang around with the person.

If you answer yes to both, you continue the relationship.

Things like musical taste, what movies they like, there sense of humor, what food they like to eat, and dozens of other little things are pretty much irrelevant to a good relationship.

I think of my marriage as a 'supermarriage', I can't see us failing, we still act like newlyweds, and we've been together for almost 17 years. Yet we have completely opposite tastes in music, very different tastes in food, different tastes in entertainment, have a different sense of humor, different academic interests, and somewhat different personalities. We do share some core values which I think IS important. She doesn't like what I listen to musically which doesn't matter at all, but if she kept telling me I was going to hell for my sinful ways it wouldn't have worked out.

On paper we didn't match well. Her roommate said we should break up (to her), frat brothers said I should break up with her. She didn't listen to her roommate (in fact she was rather mad at her for saying it), I didn't listen to my frat brothers, and here we are still happily married 16 years later.

I had my doubts early on, I wasn't sure what I wanted to do when it became apparent we were heading into long term serious relationship territory, I wasn't sure I wanted to go there with her, but I was still having fun with her, and still wanted to be with her.

Obviously those doubts are long gone, but I still am having fun and I still want to be with her. Thats pretty much all that matters.

02-21-2008, 07:49 AM	#15 (permalink)
Ustwo Pissing in the cornflakes	There is one quality I've noticed among men who have gone from the still youngish single stage to the old and pathetically alone and willing to settle for anything stage, and that is while they were youngish and single they were always looking for that perfect girl to marry. But for some reason it never worked out, never found that perfect one, or if they did, that one didn't want them. Pretty much no one was ever good enough for them in their eyes. The problem is people do over think their relationships. They look at stuff thats not important and treat it like its very important. My rule for dating and relationships would be. #1 Do you have fun with the person. #2 Do you want hang around with the person. If you answer yes to both, you continue the relationship. Things like musical taste, what movies they like, there sense of humor, what food they like to eat, and dozens of other little things are pretty much irrelevant to a good relationship. I think of my marriage as a 'supermarriage', I can't see us failing, we still act like newlyweds, and we've been together for almost 17 years. Yet we have completely opposite tastes in music, very different tastes in food, different tastes in entertainment, have a different sense of humor, different academic interests, and somewhat different personalities. We do share some core values which I think IS important. She doesn't like what I listen to musically which doesn't matter at all, but if she kept telling me I was going to hell for my sinful ways it wouldn't have worked out. On paper we didn't match well. Her roommate said we should break up (to her), frat brothers said I should break up with her. She didn't listen to her roommate (in fact she was rather mad at her for saying it), I didn't listen to my frat brothers, and here we are still happily married 16 years later. I had my doubts early on, I wasn't sure what I wanted to do when it became apparent we were heading into long term serious relationship territory, I wasn't sure I wanted to go there with her, but I was still having fun with her, and still wanted to be with her. Obviously those doubts are long gone, but I still am having fun and I still want to be with her. Thats pretty much all that matters. __________________ Agents of the enemies who hold office in our own government, who attempt to eliminate our "freedoms" and our "right to know" are posting among us, I fear.....on this very forum. - host Obama - Know a Man by the friends he keeps.