Skutch

So last summer, my 2 kids (8 and 10) and I went to the store to get a few groceries. My daughter (10) asked if she could get a drinks bottle for her soccer games. I already had 2 of them at home, so I said no. She started to get angry and said to me: you always get (my son) whatever he wants, you like him better than me. She proceeded to start crying and sat on the floor of the store refusing to get up. I told her in a steady voice to get up now. Reluctantly she did, and we proceeded to leave the store directly...I just left the cart there in the aisle I was so pissed, and we walked out.

We get in the car, and drive a few miles in silence. I then started shouting (loudly) at both kids, saying they're spoiled, that I'm the parent and they're the children, and that they should follow my rules and respect me and not vice versa. My daughter had stopped crying and was clearly frightened, my son as well.

Fast forward one week. I'm walking out of my house to the sight of my ex-wife approaching me up the walk with a court order in her hand. She hands it to me in silence, gets in her car and drives away.

It was an emergency motion to temporarily suspend my visitation rights with my daughter (not my son). So, for the past 7 months, Ive been seeing my daughter according to the schedule: once a week for a few hours, and one overnight a month, where before it was 2x a week and every other weekend.

Now I'm not saying that shouting is the best method of disciplining, I've learned this. I have never hit either of my kids, not once. I don't drink, smoke, drugs, nothing. I ask my daughter when I see her when I go pick up my son if she is afraid of me...no. I ask her if she would like to spend a few nights at my house, yes. She cries and says she misses me. She has built up very good friendships with the kids in my neighborhod, they do things together all the time, year round. I take them to activities, funtions, birthday parties, they have sleepovers at my place, I cook for them, etc. We've been to a social worker who has seen us interact and has commented on the lack of fear my daughter seems to show towards me.

Last night, my ex filed a motion for a permanent change in the visitation schedule. I would see my daughter 4x a month for a few hours, and 1 overnight a month.

My ex has a boyfriend of 3 years. He comes and goes, and doesn't seem to want to marry my ex. Why buy the milk, perhaps. He doesn't buy the kids clothes or fix stuff around her house. Whatever. He pays much attention to my daughter, coaches her in soccer, and they seem to have a decent relationship. I'm sure my ex encourages the relationship, as she despises me.

Anyone in the house have any thoughts, comments, opinions on the matter? Thanks for reading.