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How young were you two when you got married?
Sounds to me like, after years (how many?) of marriage, your wife wants to sew some wild oats (again? I mean, did she ever, in her younger days?). Now, that might not include sexual infidelity. Then again, it might. Eventually (if not already). She's certainly hanging out, a lot, in a place where she is likely to be enticed by that sort of thing. (BTW: How many of these friends/co-workers of your wife are single? Any of them recently separated or divorced?)
Myself, I think a married person going out with his or her co-workers and/or friends, to a bar, is okay on occasion. But when it gets to be 3-4 times a week? That's so not okay.
Oh, and your wife isn't becoming a stranger to you, so much as she's showing a facet of herself that you never saw before (or never chose to see).
One more observation: Your wife is an extrovert, right? And are you an introvert?
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