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Originally Posted by Ustwo
I don't to a point.
If you are married and your wife decides shes done with sex, that doesn't mean its fair you are done too.
Its not selfish to expect her to care enough about YOUR needs to take care of them at least once in a while. At worst if its not hurting her, its a chore, and while no one likes doing chores you do them because its worse if you don't do them. Be it laundry, or doing dishes or in this case doing your husband.
While its her right to say no, I think after a point it would be his right to seek sexual gratification else where. Personally I think thats when its time for a divorce.
A marriage isnt' only about sex, in fact sex may be a lower priority then a lot of things, but once its never about sex, its now at best a friendship (and normally due to the strain the sex issue has, not a good one).
I suppose what I have to wonder about is why so many sexless marriages have the member not getting it afraid to pull the plug. I can't say I know the details of a lot of them, but those I do know are either in a state of total disarray or had no one happy in it until they were divorced.
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and what if its a decision that cant be helped? Suppose Dave lost his dick in some freak flogging accident (yes I was making a joke....feel free to insert whatever horrible accident that could happen and leave him unable to perform) should I divorce him because there is no sex and we'd be at a friendship stage?
I think not
I have been known to engage in activities even when I didnt feel like it to make HIM feel good, but the difference is he doesnt expect me to do that. If I say "no" he knows its not going to happen. BUT 7 times out of 10 I usually offer a bj if I myself am not in the "mood" to be taken to heights of glorious passion (isnt it sad how there ARE actually times we dont want that lol). The conversation will usually go something like
Dave "I wanna take you in the bedroom and fuck you really hard"
Shannon "Its been a really rough day, Im too tired to participate and I'd feel guilty just laying there....I would really love to give you a blow job though"
lol this is when we get the closest to an "argument" that we ever have. He will decide that its more important for him to mess with me and give me an orgasm so I can releax than for him to have one. We waste more time laying in bed deciding who is going to get who off if we dont feel like intercourse.