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I've had a few female friends join up. Usually it was because they had no clue what to do with the rest of their lives (their words). They were given money, structure, and duty. One has lost her arm. UCM, I hope your girlfriend realizes that just because she doesn't have a Y chromosome doesn't mean she won't potentially be in danger. I'm not trying to make you afraid, and I sympathize with your situation (though I can't claim to relate).
Keep talking with her about it. She needs to understand that her decision is seriously having a negative effect the people she loves. Not only that, but this mums the word policy on why she's going doesn't fly. It's really fucked up, to be blunt.
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