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Thing is, while we have always had great sex, it's damn tough for me to physically hurt her, which i know full well i am doing. But honestly, she seems to enjoy it!? No, not "seems". She tells me she does!!!
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Speaking as someone who does enjoy that kindof play a great deal I can tell you she really truly does enjoy it. Yes it hurts and it brings tears to her eyes and she can't help but cry out but gods it feel soo good.
At the same time you need to decide if you can do that, some people are capable of enjoying it and others are not if you're not forcing yourself to do it will just build up resentment between the two of you.
I'd agree with Shanis post about bondage research and add in masochism and submission to your research list.