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I can speak to both of these from my own experience and I can say that a little bit of both jealousy and misplaced anger are both natural and tolerable.
But as far as I'm concerned, in excess they both stem from a sense of insecurity and immaturity that are expelled from the self and used to lash out others, especially those closest to us. And both of them will poison your marriage.
But all that said...it might be a good idea to pursue some form of therapy. You could have some minor depression or bipolar issues going on. Brain chemistry. A lot of things that people chalk up to self-controllable issues such as immaturity and insecurity can often be chalked up to an irregular functioning of the brain. Similar to many other types of bodily disorder so don't get down on yourself just yet - it's just an organ, after all. Just get yourself checked out.
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Most people go through life dreading they'll have a traumatic experience. Freaks were born with their trauma. They've already passed their test in life. They're aristocrats. - Diane Arbus
PESSIMISM, n. A philosophy forced upon the convictions of the observer by the disheartening prevalence of the optimist with his scarecrow hope and his unsightly smile. - Ambrose Bierce
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