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Who would I choose to be stuck with on a desert island? Definitely my wife. But in all honesty I love time to myself and she doesn't give me nearly enough of that. So the stuck-on-an-island thing would be more than a bit of a strain for me.
Can I imagine too different and too similar coexisting in a relationship? Yes, Merlocke, we may just live in the same zip code! My wife and I share the same values and my values mean more to me than anything else. She is the only person I have ever met that I can say that about and that's why I love her. But our interests are so different that it is sometimes very hard for me to enjoy conversing with her (and vice versa). Basically, her interests bore me to tears (she says she does not particularly care about a lot of the things that I get excited about either). She also has some very annoying habits. Sometimes she seems only able to focus on the most trivial aspects of what I'm talking about. Other times she'll interrupt me to point out the most mundane things going on with the people in our surroundings - right as I'm telling her something that is important to me (and what she's interrupting me with is important to her and urgent, she tells me, because that person can only be noticed at that moment).
Abaya brought up household chores and, I agree, looking at that situation in a marriage tells a lot. And my partner and I are both guilty in our relationship of holding to roles. We profess all the time to wanting to change and yet, clearly, find "safety" in codependency.
We have been married for eight and a half years. No, I don't always have that "in love" feeling. Sometimes she gets on my nerves, sometimes she just tires me. But I always come back around to feeling excited about what will come next for us. We have grown so much together that we are no longer the same people that we were when we met. I can't imagine my life without her and I know that personal growth, for me, means dealing with the issues that I believe that I have with her.
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